Monday, August 9, 2021

Where To Begin

2020 was a rough year:

Most of the year was going to doctors and being sick, this was me, then wham my dear husband got sick and we did not understand why, he was bleeding profusely, so we went to the ER, they admitted him, and did a colonoscopy, said they did not see anything, give a blood clotting medicine and after 4 day hospital stay they sent him home.  He still was bleeding some but not as bad, after afew days home the blood rush came again, back to ER same thing, admitted him, and this time did a Endoscopy,  In it they found a 5mm bleeding Ulcer, at the top of his stomach, why on earth they didn't do an endoscopy the first time is beyond me, it may of made a real difference in the outcome. They give him 2 pints of blood and medicines, after 5 days of freezing in his room he got to come home, wonderful can be together again, oh I love that man I was so excited.
When he come home I fixed all his favorite foods but he could not eat much, he still was freezing, I wrapped him in a heating blanket and still he could not get warm, so after 4 days of this I called his doctor and told him and he seen him right away, he was so weak I had to get a wheelchair to get him into the office. The doctor took his temp normal,low but normal, he took his oxygen level, it did not even register, so they brought in a big oxygen machine and it registered 84, well he called for the rescue to take him back to the hospital, they came and took him into ER room, soon as he was settled they said I could go in with him. (Taking a moment because this is so painful) I stayed as long as I could, they admitted him again, and he said he wanted me to get home before dark, I didn't  want to go, but he insisted, and I didn't want him upset set, so I kissed him goodbye and told him I loved him and would see him tomorrow.  They did tests and said he had Pneumonia in both lungs and infection, how when he was only home 4 days, they did another Covid testtoo, and wala it was positive, he had to get it in the hospital, not sure about any of that, but of course I couldn't see him, he just got worse and worse, his oxygen levels would not come up, so after 5 days of fighting and him non responsive for 2 days they said he would not recover, so now they let me see him, I had to have them take the bipap off him, and I prayed so hard he would live without out , but he took a couple deep breaths and just quit breathing, December 23, 2020 how did all this happen in just one month??? Beyond my wildest dreams I never thought I would have to go on without him. 
He was my life, my love my strength for over 60 years, so God took him home, and I do not doubt for a second that he is happy with Jesus.  Now Jesus is my beloved, my love my strength, I could not go on without my lord and his grace. It will be 8 months the 23 of August,, and the lord has taken care of me, I want for nothing physical, or Spiritual, my only want is that I go to be with Jesus and my dear husband.
I am sorry this was so long, and there is much in between untold also, just not that important, here is one of the last pictures I took of him, and I,, at Thanksgiving he cut a tree down in the back, still very vital. Oh what a day makes a difference, love your husband and family you never know when Jesus will claim them.

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